Tommymaaltman.blogspot.com continues to grow and exceeds all expectations.

Many years ago tommymaaltman.blogspot.com was a little voice in cyberspace. Now look at it!!! Eight followers and three published comments. Could anyone ever have predicted this level of success? To celebrate this phenonenom let's each pour a favorite dram this evening. I'll not critique this one. I'm taking the rest of the year off. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year followers. Slainte, Tommy Maaltman

Tommy Maaltman's Wild, Wild, West. Lassiter meets the Gambler.

Kicking in the swinging doors of The Hole in the Wall Saloon, Lassiter knocked out the rotten two front teeth of the poor drunk standing too close on the other side. He scanned the room with his steely grey eyes and instantly there was stone cold silence. His face was as rough as the land he rode over and as dry as the floor of Death valley Desert. Dressed all in black leather with a day's ride worth of dust and grit, Lassiter walked to the round table where sitting with his back to the wall was the Gambler dressed in a fine black suit, Homburg hat, rattle snake skull Bolo tie and fine linen shirt, waiting to cheat some poor bastard out of his last two cents. Lassiter sat down across from the Gambler and said, "Its time someone taught you a lesson." Glancing at the toothless unshaven barkeep named, "Gums" Lassiter didn't have to say a word. He knew to bring him a bottle of the house's finest cask strength single malt Scotch whisky and two glasses. The Gambler started to shuffle his stacked deck of marked cards and as Lassiter cut the deck said, "How about all or nothing 5 card draw?'" Lassiter nodded, the cards were dealt and the Gambler's fate was sealed. Lassiter's discarded two cards and was dealt two more. The Gambler discarded one card and drew another. The Gambler said to Lassiter, " Show em," and Lassiter laid down his cards face up on the table showing a full house, Kings over Queens. After a poignant pause, the Gambler looked Lassiter in the eyes and said, "Too bad," as he laid his cards down on the table showing four aces and a Jack. Lassiter looked at the four aces and then into the Gambler's black eyes and said, "Turn over the rest of the deck so we all can see em." A single drop of perspiration appeared on the Gambler's ashen forehead. Seconds after the cards were all turned over showing several more aces at the bottom of the deck, Lassiter drew his 44 Magnum and squeezed the trigger sending a 246 GR lead round nose slug directly through the Gambler's black hardened heart. The Gambler fell back over in his chair and was dead before he hit the ground. All the eye witnesses in The Hole in the Wall agreed, he was a no good cheating scum bag and he was killed in self defense although the Gambler's gun was never found. Lassiter asked for several more glasses and poured all the eye witnesses a dram of Teaninich cask strength single malt whisky, 106.7, 61% with a deathly pale yellow color, strong wet cement nose, undertaker's phenol and grey tea taste, and powerful explosive gunpowder finish. Later that day the Gambler's body was dumped unceremoniously in an unmarked grave on Boot Hill. May he rest in peace. Slainte, Tommy Maaltman

Tommy "Chicken Little" Maaltman screams, "The sky is falling, the sky is falling!"

What's all the fuss about building a Mosque on the sacred grounds of 911 in lower Manhattan? I urge you to turn your attention to a more pressing concern. Tommy has it by good authority that the Flying Buttresses of Notre Dame de Paris Cathedral are disintegrating and the famous landmark will soon collapse into a pile of rubble. Tommy says that before this happens, to the Master Builder's chagrin, let's tear down the old gal and replace it with a white clapboard and red brick Christian Reformed Church! Out with the olde Kirk and in with the new Kirk. Sure some will argue that the old cathedral has special sentimental meaning to certain people. But with 1.7 percent of Europeans attending mass on a regular basis, they will get over it. Moreover, the new Christian Reformed Church will be open to everybody as long as you are willing to give up dancing and watching TV on Sundays. And while you are not dancing and watching TV on Sundays, why not enjoy a dram of BenRinnes 15 year old Flora and Fauna single malt scotch whisky, 43 vol. with a communion red dark brown color, sherry and burnt toffee nose, licorice and anise taste and a satisfying, soothing, spiritual finish. Amen brother. Slainte, chirp, chirp, Tommy Maaltman

Tommy Maaltman loves Richard Milhouse Nixon.

Tommy Maaltman loves Richard Milhouse Nixon, but not in a homosexual way! In the early 70's I was a physically fit pre med student with a low draft lottery number and the Viet Nam war was raging. Having successfully passed my induction physical I was told to go home and wait for "The Call." As a young man, with no sense of mortality I was excited and anxiously awaited to be drafted into the United States Army. The call never came. President Nixon expertly and diplomatically ended this tragic war. The Maaltman finished pre med studies and started medical school uninterrupted and alive. Here's to you Mr. President. Let's toast Richard Milhouse Nixon with a dram of Glenfiddich ( pronounced with a DICK,) 21 year old, Gran Reserva, vol. 40 with an apricot color, chocolate nose, sweet Cuban coffee taste and juicy fruity finish. RMN is no crook in my book. Be sure to visit the presidential museum in Yorba Linda, California and pick up the most recent biography A Life in Full Richard M. Nixon by Conrad Black. Slainte, Tommy Maaltman

Tommy Maaltman on great pardons in history.

God forgave the Jews when his son Jesus dying on the cross said, "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do." Archduchess of Austria, Maria Theresa pardoned General Wallis and General Neipperg for their lackluster performance in the Hapsburg and Ottoman Battle for Europe. Gerald R. Ford pardoned Richard Milhouse Nixon thus ending the "Nations nightmare." Why should Tommy Maaltman pardon the Macallan Distillery for their less than stellar line of the Fine Oak Range of Scotch single malt whisky? Being a big fan of the Oloroso Butts Sherry cask aged Macallan, I often wonder, What was the thought process in coming out with the Fine Oak Range aged in Bourbon oak barrels? I may be too critical but try a dram of The Macallan Fine Oak 10 year old 40 vol. with a golden honey color, gentle clean barley nose, fresh clean fruit and spice taste and balanced finish. Compared to the many other fine Macallan choices of various ages, I think it's lacking. But if somebody said, "Tommy, would you like another dram of The Macallan Fine Oak 10 year old?" I would say, "Yes please!" Slainte, Tommy Maaltman