Tommy gets treated for frostbite.

Recently I went to my Dermatologist, an old friend and alpine skier from Poland, for treatment of a facial lesion that developed after being exposed to 60 mile an hour winds in negative 5 degree farenheit temperature while skiing in the Tetons. Marek took one look at the lesion and said, "no problem," in his thick eastern European accent as he reached for a canister of liquid nitrogen. Directing the nozzle at the lesion he expertly delivered aerosolized liquid nitrogen millimeters from my right eye freezing the affected area and causing an instant stinging seconds before my skin went numb and lifeless. Oh, so this is how single malt whisky must feel after dumping ice cubes into it! First an ice cold sting, then it goes numb draining and destroying the taste and essence of the malt. The moral of this piece is, don't freeze anything unless you want to destroy it's essence. Think about that as you enjoy a dram of Ben Nevis 10 year old with a bronze appearance, hard dark chocolate nose, Belgium dark chocolate and toffee flavor and cigar smoke finish, NEAT!!! Slainte, Tommy Maaltman

Tommy revolutionizes anger management for the disgruntled employee.

After sitting through the work place anger management video for the umpteenth time as I was signing the attestation form stating that I understood the contents and will try harder to control my temper, a light bulb went off in my head! Instead of the same old anger management recommendations why not have a dram of single malt the next time you unload on some poor old incompetent co-worker/underling. I recommend an Auchentoshan 1973 29 year old sherry butt, No 793, 55.8 vol., pinkish red in color, peachy nose, fluffy, fruity taste, and nutty finish. This may be the best reason for an exception to the rule, No Alcohol in the Workplace, if there ever was one. And with a more effective anger management program in place, wouldn't it make sense to lift the oppressive, No Hand Guns in the Workplace Policy? If this doesn't improve your mood next time you go postal, nothing will. Slainte, Tommy Maaltman

Tommy raises a unibrow.

This may raise a collective unibrow in the Muslim world but anyone remotely interested in the War on Terror should read the book, Enemies At The Gate by Andrew Wheatcroft, dealing with the age-old and unending struggle between the Christian Faith and the vast, malevolent, dark power of Islam. And speaking of dark and powerful, why not poor yourself a dram of Ben Nevis 123.8, 61.9% 15 year old bottled in 1984 with a dark, rich, oily, mahogany appearance. So dark even a blind man could pick it out of a line up. Too bad it's no longer available for purchase. I think I have the last remaining bottle in the world thanks to Paul Rossi losing a bet when he confidently held his bottle up and boldly said to me, "If you can identify this single malt it's yours." It was easier than snatching candy from an hydrocephalic newborn baby with it's one of a kind dark mahogany color. The nose is astringent with a aromatic burnt caramel taste and a 9/11 finish. Slainte, Tommy Maaltman

Tommy says, "let them drink cake!"

Marie Antoinette allegedly famously said, " Qu'ils mangent de la Brioch, (Let them eat cake) shortly before her head was severed from her body by the Quillotine during the Reign of Terror of the French Revolution. At the time the French people were starving and were unable to even afford bread. Pondering this historic time in history, I couldn't help but think about the single malt whisky, Royal Lochnagar Rare Malts, 24 year old, distilled 1972 ,55.7 vol., with a royal gold color, fresh baked nose, spicy, sweet taste and cake dusted with cinnamon and nutmeg finish. Perhaps a better choice of words for the Queen would have been, "Let them drink cake," thus satiating the unruly mob and saving her pompous neck. Slainte, Tommy Maaltman

Tommy responds to Patty O'Ds offer to buy a bottle of single malt.

Over vacation after we enjoyed a Glenmorangie original 10 year old single malt, Patty O'D offered to buy the next bottle. I responded, "No need," as I thought to myself, there is no way I'm going to let Patty O'D use my daughter's Martha's Vineyard gift certificate that I gave here for Christmas to buy me another bottle of single malt. Nobody puts baby in a corner. But if Patty O'D happens to see an interesting bottle at Binny's in Chicago, I say, "go for it.". Perhaps a Glenmorangie Nector d'Or additionally matured in a French wine barriques after a minimum of ten years in bourbon casks. Color lemon, nose wine fruits and spice, with a taste of lemons, custard, and gingerbread with a spicy and fruity finish. Now that's a dram! Slainte, Tommy Maaltman

Tommy's blog is an overnight success!

Yes it's true, Tommy Maaltman's Malt Musing Blog is an overnight success. I noticed I now have five followers, (granted all family members, but it's a start,) which is the same number of distinct flavors in the Bowmore Legend. The color is gold with a peat and smoke nose as expected of an Islay. On the palate there are five distinct flavors of leaves, ferns, peat, iron, and sweetness. The finish is sweet and salty. As the flavors open up in my mouth I anxiously awake comments from my followers, "The Following Maaltmen." Slainte, Tommy Maaltman

Tommy convinces his Irish son law that Scotch single malt whisky is the true Uisge Beatha, (aqua vitae.)

As we gathered on the upper deck at the lake house, Tommy expounded on the virtues of Scotch single malt whisky. Patty O'D no stranger to booze, was skeptical until Tommy uncorked a Glenmorangie Original 10 year old, 40 vol. with an antique gold color, floral, fruity, butterscotch and toffee nose, a nutty oranges and lemons taste, and a spicy finish. This was a crowd pleaser. Patty was sold on, but did not offer to buy more of this single malt! Slainte, Tommy Maaltman