Tommy Maaltman gets fondled.

The last time I was fondled by the Feds while standing in an airport security line, my special nail clipper, given to me by a pharmaceutical representative twenty years ago, was confiscated. Boy have times changed! Pharmaceutical reps are no long allowed to give small marketing tokens for fear of corrupting the physicians prescribing ethics and morals. On the other hand it is now legal and sanctioned for a TSA agent to grope your package! Next time I travel I plan on wearing a Berka which, due to the anti profiling policies, are hands off to the security personnel. I don't think it counts as cross dressing in case you are wondering. Speaking of hands off, did you know that the Dutch drink genever gin by bending over and with their mouth only tip the glass upward and swallow the shot of ice cold gin? Don't try this at home with your favorite cask strength single malt Scotch whisky especially if it is smoky and peaty like Ardbeg Airigh Nam Beist, 1990, 46 vol. with a straw color, peat nose, burning peat and seaweed taste, and bonfire smoke finish. A spilled drop or two might just set of the smoke alarms. Slainte, Tommy Maaltman